Thinker-1Hey kids. This week we have a love problem. This chick Rachael treated her man like dookie, and now he's gun-shy around her and she realized she might love his ass. That's a tough one. Keep reading. Be warned, she just launches into it!

ok well i was with this man his name is jimmy for about four years on and off. this relationship started when i was about 15 and i am now 19. when i was 18 i moved away to go to college and we stayed together at first but i was kind of crazy and like wanted to go out and experience my new freedom so things didnt work out. as of right now we are not together. i am still in love with him, i dont know if he is the right one for me or if i just still like him because hes so familiar but his feelings are not the same. throughout our reltationship he was totally in love with me he chased me for like a year and we were friends for a while before we got together and since he was so in love with me i never thought he would leave me, so i didnt exactly treat him that great, and so now that were not together he like he says he doesnt feel the same way about me because i treated him so bad in the past. i dont know what to do like there are alot of other guys i could be with but im scared to get close to another guy again and like when i go back to visit my parents i see him sometimes and weve hooked up since weve been broken up and i know he thinks im hot and stuff i just dont know if i can get him back emotionally. so im just asking basically if i should continue living like this just waiting for him to realize or if i should just move on. i have dated casually a few other guys but nothing this deep.

thanks for your advice let me know what you think
xo

Rachael

In my head, I could literally hear her jabbering that at me without pausing for a breath. Slow down on the Red Bulls, chica! This is a tough one because I'm thinking you're sorta at fault since I read you treated him all wrong. But people learn. Keep reading.

This is a tough one. Firstly, I have some questions. What does this person do? I'm dying to know. Work for Oxfam? Can I have her frequent flyer miles in payment for the advice? Bitch sounds like she gets around the globe. Anyway, keep reading for some tips to help her out.



Dear Rachael (interesting spelling),

Jimmy better run for them thar hills! You're a mess and will have him begging for his sanity. For real, it sounds like you two are REALLY REALLY young and need to ease up on each other. You've got your whole lives ahead of you unless you have one of those untitled diseases like on "General Hospital" when Brenda was sick and going insane and went over the cliff and they never told you what she had! Do some research, soap writing assholes! By the way? You probably shouldn't end up with a dude that you've been dating since you were 15. There's no mystery, and it rarely works. At least take a big long break and sleep with a lot of other people to make sure he's the penis you want to entertain for the rest of your life. And you should NEVER treat someone like shit BECAUSE THEY LOVE YOU. That's some sick shit. But a lot of us take that person for granted, don't we? I get cranky with the boyfriend a lot, and he's like "you're a cranky bitch guy" and I'm like "no, you are" and he's like "I didn't just throw a full glass of milk all over you because I had a bad day at work, Burning Bed". I'll let you decide if that's a true story or not. And why are YOU scared to get close to another guy? Are you afraid they'll treat you like you treated him? You need to treat people with respect, and if you don't feel it for them, let em' down easy. Also, it sounds like you're still intimate. Does he seem possessed by a demon and get really rough with you when you're together sexually? That's what we called "hate-f*cking" and it's a sport many people engage in with exes or soon to be exes. He could be imagining killing you with his penis in his head out of vengeance. What I would do is be honest. Admit your mistakes, apologize, explain that you have feelings for him still and see what he says. Try and be honest with each other and take it from there. Honesty is the best way to go. Oh, and use protection. Babies born of "hate-f*cking" end up being serial killers or president.

Please continue sending me your love stories, hate stories, and not sure stories to harvey.advice@gmail.com! I LOVE YOUR E-MAILS!

Note to our readers, J. Harvey is in no way a counselor, advisor, professional, priest, or in any way qualified to be giving out advice. Please take it with a grain of salt and a sense of humor. In other words, don't sue.






10 Comments

LIKE, for reals, like! I had to stop reading her story because she actually typed "like", like a million fucking times.

Ask yourself this one BIG question, Rachael --- Do you bring out the very best in one another?

If not, move on. It sounds like you're hanging on because you can't stand rejection and you have something to prove. Ego cannot be the basis for any relationship. Never works.

January 29, 2008 2:57 PM

J, did you post that in hopes that we'd read it and summarize. Because I had to stop, not so much regarding the overuse of "life" but the lack of punctuation and then because I really didn't care about a 19-year old's drama.

January 29, 2008 3:03 PM

no, he posted because he is hilarious and i couldnt get past the Burning Bed. LOVE YOU J!

Rachael,
Stay in school, you need it. I have to wonder about a guy that hangs around with a woman that abuses him-move on from this guy, you are too young anyway.

J. Harvey, thanks for making me laugh (again)!

January 29, 2008 4:22 PM

1st of all: Persistent Cat; you suck.

Back to the problem at hand....

leave that poor guy alone!!! You had your chance and blew it... i don't think you love him, you just love the fact that he use to bow to you....

its over and good for poor Jimmy!!!!!

GET OVER IT and MOVE on, Next.....

January 29, 2008 4:48 PM

Like OMG, she is soooo preggerz!

She skipped more periods than a Catholic mother of 12 ... in a single paragraph!


January 29, 2008 5:00 PM

ACTUAL "LIKE" COUNT:

Rachael Email= 7
J. Harvey's Response = 8

Altho Rachael's had like four or five likes that didn't like even belong... and like J. Harvey was all like just using them to like mock her. Either way, I liked the hell out of it, and it gave me my US RDA of ridicularity for the end of my work day!

Thanks J.!

January 29, 2008 10:20 PM

Why do I suck? The girl is a special ed case. And for God's sake, it's probably made up. Do you really think someone actually emails with a legit problem. If she exists, she only lives on myspace.

***I am in no way saying the good people at A Socialite's Life are making it up. I assume it's some of the more intelligent readers of this site who are having some fun.***

January 30, 2008 2:22 PM

OMG hahaha hate-f**ing! J, I never knew there was a word for that, thank you!

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Socialite Life provides your recommended daily dose of celebrity gossip, photos, & media speculation - brought to you in digestible bites. To be enjoyed with a martini (and with a sense of humor).

Editors: Lisa Timmons & J. Harvey
Media Producer: Wayne Ford

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