(Totally unrelated video, but why the hell not? Sing it girl.)

The only reason I would ever watch The View is to see people make that conservative cretin chick cry. Rosie's apparently started getting around to it. Elizabeth was speaking in defense of the Patriot Act and big Rose shut her ass down.

On today's edition of the crack-like ABC gabfest, Rosie O'Donnell got Elisabeth Hasselbeck's conservative knickers into a big twist when Ro argued with her usual vehemence against the Patriot Act, concluding by hitting Liz with the ageist remark, "You're very young, and you're very wrong," (E is 30, Ro is 45). This, of course, just wound Elisabeth right up, prompting a strange pointy hand-dance of rage.

Rosie then really stuck it to Elisabeth, suggesting that resorting to ageism is the only way she can bottle her Hulk-like rage to sit at the same table with someone with whom she disagrees "so abhorrently."

Rosie's almost as irritating as Hasselbeck, what with the haikus and the "liars get cancer" shtick. But if she were to reach over and clothesline that pinhead off her stool, there wouldn't be a lot of sympathy.

The good people behind Oscar Blandi clued me in on how to steal the straight hair styles that were a hot trend on the Oscar red carpet. The Raffinata Straightening Balm was the secret weapon to score the look.

Oscar Blandi is a celebrity stylist and provides the answer to fight frizzy hair. Reese Witherspoon, Nicole Kidman, and Gwyneth Paltrow all sported the sleek and sexy look for the mother of all award shows. Their stunning look has spiked the interest in the super-sleek style.

A dime sized amount of the balm, a comb, and a blow dryer does the trick. Oscar's creation is designed to impart smoothness, body, and silky locks. The Raffinata prevents static and is an excellent frizz fighter. The look is achieved without build up and doesn't weigh your hair down. The wheat protein and sea algae further add moisture and protection for your locks.

To prove confidence in the product, I will personally be testing it, thanks to Oscar Blandi. Next week, catch a before and after post for a true testament of the power of Blandi's balm. Try it for yourself for just $19.00 at Sephora, Fred Segal, Jeffrey New York, The Oscar Blandi Salon and Nordstrom.

All the stars who currently AREN'T in rehab are making an effort to let Britney know that she's loved and shit . Where were YOU people when she was out gallavanting with Paris? Couldn't you have stepped in then? The damage is already done! Her kids think she's the homeless woman who barges into their house every now and then to beg for cigarettes and Red Bull and use the toilet.

Justin Timberlake and Pink are among the stars who have secretly been reaching out to show their support to Britney Spears as the pop singer battles substance abuse in rehab. Friends claim Timberlake left a personal message for his ex-girlfriend after calling the Promises treatment centre in Malibu, California last week. A pal tells America's Life + Style magazine, "He wished her the best and told her to get healthy and come back as the Britney he knew." And Timberlake has asked Spears' mother Lynn to keep him updated with the singer's progress. Pink and Mary J. Blige have also called Promises to leave messages for Spears, who, under the centre's rules, isn't allowed to receive phonecalls during her stay.

That's nice. If Justin really cared about her, he'd lend her his stylist. Mary J., too. I don't know about Pink's, unless Britney wants to look like Pat Benatar's whimsical butch lesbian sister. With that haircut, she's got the butch part down. She should be driving a UPS truck, or piercing nipples for a living with that wiffle.

(Image source: US Magazine)

The ravishing Miss Elizabeth Taylor and her white diamonds celebrated her 75th birthday in Las Vegas. I loved my grandmother's, but I wish I could have had a third one, and it could have been Elizabeth Taylor. She wouldn't have given a shit that I liked boys. She would just want a fourth for bridge, and we could try on all her jewelry and discuss how she stole her husband's from other women. Debbie Reynolds and her daughter Princess Leia were present at the party, too. This is funny because Nana Taylor stole Eddie Fisher, Debbie's then husband and Carrie's Dad back in the dark ages and married his ass. Talk about forgiveness on Debbie's part. I'd be putting ground glass in her salad.

(Splash)

Find out which celebs attended Elizabeth Taylor's birthday bash in Vegas after the jump.

• The Fantastic Four 2 trailer is now online, and it features a little boy-on-boy affection courtesy of co-star Chris Evans. [Towleroad]
• According to Star magazine, Howard K. Stern pimped out Anna Nicole Smith to various dudes because he felt it was "good for business and good for the future," whatever that means. [INO]
• Vincent Pastore says no to "Dancing With the Stars. [People]
• Sorry, 'Las Vegas' fans; the NBC drama will return for it's fifth season without co-stars James Caan and Nikki Cox. [ICYDK]
• Pete Doherty reportedly moved in with girlfriend Kate Moss. The crackhead was spotted carrying his belongings--a gold record, a banjo, and a car seat--into her North London home. [SOW]
• Gwen Stefani claimed she didn't intend for her solo career to continue on for a second album; the singer said she's ready to reunite with her old band, No Doubt. [CDL]

(Flynet/WENN)

Cameron Diaz and Jennifer Aniston had a plastic surgery-klatch about the dude who worked rhinoplasty miracles for them. I don't see a difference. But I'm sure when you're a neurotic Hollywood-type, a miniscule shaving of flesh can make you a new woman.

Cameron Diaz, 34, couldn't stop gushing to Jennifer Aniston, 38, about a certain mystery man the two have in common, as the duo partied the evening away at the Night Before Oscar party at the Beverly Hills Hotel on February 24.

Who was this mystery man? None other than Beverly Hills plastic surgeon Raj Kanodia, the man behind Diaz and Aniston's recent rhinoplasty surgeries. (Aniston went under the knife on January 20, while Diaz had hers done last November). While Diaz, 34, gushed to Aniston that her nose was "the nose my nose always wanted to be," she also couldn't help raving about Kanodia's spiritual side and the impact it's had on her life.

I love how they keep repeating Cameron's age. She must adore that. No wonder why she's taken to lying around public parks and smoking herb and not caring. People keep rubbing in how decrepit she is. She's practically dust. A big pile of dust with yellowed dentures. And maybe one of those canes that ends in a miniature walker.

It's pretty clear from this video that Lisa and Wayne are so rarely allowed to come near an actual red carpet, and with good reason. It's a little too much for them just yet. But they're doing their darndest to try and capture the spirit of the lightbulbs flashing, and yelling of "Hef! Hef! Hef! Holly! Holly! Holly!" in video montage form.

So, for those of you who enjoy moving pictures and fabulous ta-ta's, please enjoy.

Only at Sephora can you find Ojan's Restorative Hair Treatment. This is a uniquely formulated versatile hair rejuvenator. Ojan's Restorative Hair Treatment contains 100% Ojan palm nut oil. Ojon oil is harvested and extracted by the Tawira people of Central America and has been for centuries. After the oil had been extracted from the nut it is then sent to a small village in Northern Italy where the oil is then purified and filtered to preserve the potency. Why am I telling you this? No reason I thought you might find it interesting.

This restorative hair product works to improve the condition of damaged, color treated hair without weighing your hair down. By fortifying, rebuilding and moisturizing this hair treatment will leave your hair unbelievably shiny, and manageable. You can use this product three ways as a deep conditioning treatment, a leave in conditioner or as a shine enhancer.

Find out how to use the product after the jump.

She's going to burst any day now! The woman's huge.

(Flynet)

(WENN)

Heather Mills realizes that people have many a question about how she'll fare on Dancing with the Stars seeing as one of her legs isn't biological. She says that she's got it under control.

Discussing whether her prosthetic leg might come off while she's competing, Mills - whose left leg was amputated below the knee after a 1993 motorcycle accident - tells TV's Extra, "I'm quite happy to be thrown around, and hopefully my leg will stay on."

But don't worry, she says: "It's very unlikely my leg is going to fly off, although it would be quite funny. I'll have a strap on which I wouldn't normally in every day life."

Heather went on to say that she's not banging her dance partner, and that her stint on the show will be like a "holiday" for her because of all the negative press she's getting in Britain. She's trying to get every last drop of Beatles money she can out of Sir Paul McCartney, and the country hates her. Seriously, she gets death threats. They like that piggish racist chick on Big Brother UK more than her. And that heifer was under armed guard.