OMG, I am so happy. The 8th "Cycle" of America's Next Top Model has started! I have often laid awake at night and wondered if the producers opted to call it a "cycle" because of twelve girls acting like they are one giant constant period? No matter, it's fabulous. This season, the girls are dumber than ever! How fantastic! And Tyra is crazier than ever! Even better! Each show, I look forward to her interpretation of being "real" and "caring" which apparently means turning every girl's fears, concerns and darkest secrets into how it affects Tyra. Totally made up example;
GIRL (crying): "When I was thirteen, I was raped by my brother's friend who was supposed to be babysitting me."
TYRA (brow furrowed): "That hurts me to hear that you were raped. And you know why it hurts me? Because I was a babysitter, and rape only gives a bad name to something that I used to do. And you know what? I was good at it. I was a good babysitter and I never raped nobody! OK, you can leave now."
More on Sarah's love for all things ANTM after the jump...
America's Next Top Model really is hilarious. When I was in college, I lived with five other girls and there was always some cattiness and backstabbing going on, but it was never as bad as on Top Model because we had food. Imagine how irritable you are when you haven't had lunch, or when you're starving for dinner at a restaurant, but the waiter is taking forever to bring your meal. Now imagine that feeling twenty-four hours of every day (minus cigarettes and alcohol) and you're surrounded by ten other girls just as hungry and screaming for attention as you are. And they have weapons! Those shoulder bones can slice and dice, and don't even get close to those hip bones or you'll be bleeding for days.
I can't tell you how much I am looking forward to the rest of this season. My Wednesday nights will be filled with visions of knobby knees, scrawny thighs with big lollipop heads sitting atop needle-pointed shoulders for months to come. Add to that, a rabid Tyra Banks foaming at the mouth with narcissism while squeezing uncomfortably into Cycle Eight's wardrobe, and I'm one happy viewer. With food.
Em says:
I will be right there every Wednesday night too, with a box of chocolate-covered potato chips of course. You know, to pad the hips and clavicles.
mali says:
HAHAHAHA, so right on...i think she genuinely tries to be caring and empathetic but maybe she was a Model too long. they're used to EVERYTHING revolving around them, even other people's feelings. A for effort tho :)
sasha says:
None of the girls have what it physically takes to be a nameless model on the runway. THis is tyra's stupid version of the swan. Decent for everyday but not modeling. The reason they have to starve is theyy dont have the natural good looks of models. Tyra has it backwards if somethinig is going to be average or lower on a model it should be her face not body.I hate the goddamn sob stories. What about those actual pretty models in mags if they dont do it their family starves. So no i dont care if some average i mean "real sizes" (Dove) girl has a kid and her boyfriend left so she wants to feel pretty and model.
Kel says:
Where is J.Harvey's recap???
Karen says:
That's great! I love it--and have food too....
sarah says:
BRING BACK J HARVEY RECAPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Martina says:
J Harvey Recaps! J harvey Recaps! shall I say it again...?
Tom Sederburg says:
Great example Sarah.
I needed a laugh this morning. :-)
Later,
Tom
Michele says:
Did someone say chocolate covered potato chips? Awesome!
Stephanie says:
does J. Harvey not post on ANTM anymore????
Joya
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