David Hasselhoff Tries His Hand at Damage Control

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Seriously, it's all about child custody battles and drunk celebs these days. Now that a video clip was widely circulated on the Internet of David Hasselhof on the floor, drunk, trying to eat a hamburger, while his teenage daughter cautions him from behind the camera to stop drinking. So, of course, in this highly public battle over popular opinion, it would behoove Mr. Hasselhoff to try and do some damage control, by issuing a statement to his defend his behavior.

"My ex-wife, and her latest attorney (who seems to share a thirst for publicity) recently suggested that I had not only been physically abusive to her, but that I was also physically abusive towards our two daughters, as well. This latest claim is not only utterly false, but it is also obscene."
Long story short, David's statement says, "Hey, I admit I'm an alcoholic, but I never beat my wife, who also likes to enjoy drugs and drinking from time to time." He basically calls her out for taking details of their divorce to the public. All in all, I'm sure it will make for some fun dinner conversation over the holidays. In reaction to David's statment, Debra Opri, the lawyer for Pamela Bach-Hasselhoff has a statement of her own. Boo-yah.
"Although Mr. Hasselhoff has publicly admitted the truthfulness and authenticity of a video showing him severely intoxicated in the presence of his minor daughter while she was in his custody, his private conduct behind the scenes continues to be deplorable in that he refuses to accept responsibility for his actions by transferring blame to his ex-wife."
There's more, but it just all sounds the same, pretty much. After that, I suppose Opri said to her client, "Now, I have a diamond bath scheduled at noon, as well as an appointment with my trainer to lift some gold bars as weights. So, if you think you could dig up some footage of David punching you, that'd be awesome, cause I'm running dangerously low on yachts."


15 Comments

Dear Mr. Hasselhoff,

I am sorry to hear of your recent struggles. As an author, public speaker, radio show host and sober alcoholic with nearly twelve years of sobriety, I must set you straight on a couple of things. You are a coward and a bone head. Please allow me to further elaborate on my venomous spew. Relapse is, in no way shape or form, a part of recovery. Taking a bottle of booze in a moment of weakness and tipping it upwards towards your massive cranium is not part of any program of recovery.
We, as alcoholics, must take an honest look at ourselves and be courageous enough to enter a program of recovery. Then we must abstain from the poison which we embraced for so many years. While we are abstaining, we must help and give ourselves to others. Then and only then do we learn why it is we abused alcohol and ourselves in the first place. After we learn who we are can we truly learn to accept and love ourselves. This is known as permanent sobriety. Without recovery permanent sobriety is impossible. Relapse has no place in recovery. You, your publicist and others who buy into this concept are doomed to an ultimate and untimely demise. Recovery is a painful but necessary part of permanent sobriety.

To those of you who buy into Mr. Hasselhoff's concept that relapse is part of recovery...cheers! My heart bleeds, for eminent suffering shall soon engulf you. To those of you who seek change and don't know how or where to start please visit my website www.journeywithjay.net and drop me an email or call me live Sunday nights on Blog talk radio. The number is 1-718-664-9750; the show is called "Morning's Remorse". I look forward to hearing from you and helping those who need it and want it most. Thank you all in advance for allowing me to continue to help myself by allowing me to help you...
Jay Kolo, sober alcoholic

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