Donna Martin's Mom Has Time On Her Hands, Advises Paris Hilton

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Candy Spelling 051407

Candy Spelling has sent an open letter to Paris Hilton via those lucky people over at TMZ . She's advising her to quit her evil ways and calling her spoiled and Tori Spelling right now has her face in her hands in embarrassment and she was in a made for TV movie called "Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?".

Dear Paris,

As someone who has known you for most of your life, I pay special attention to your press coverage. (Apparently, I'm not alone, based on the responses every word about you creates on TMZ.com and elsewhere.)

Paris, I'm very worried about you. The last week has not only been an obvious roller-coaster for you emotionally, but your strategy went from blaming employees and stating silly excuses like, "I don't read," to your new lawyer's tactic to have you sound mature and take some responsibility. In between, the paparazzi continue to follow you shopping and taking self-defense classes (to protect yourself in jail?), and some over-zealous friends staged embarrassing protests (three people?), and wasted taxpayer funds with a petition to pardon you.

http://aslcdn.celebuzz.com/images/2007/05/paris_hilton_051407_01-thumb.jpghttp://aslcdn.celebuzz.com/images/2007/05/paris_hilton_051407_02-thumb.jpghttp://aslcdn.celebuzz.com/images/2007/05/paris_hilton_051407_03-thumb.jpghttp://aslcdn.celebuzz.com/images/2007/05/paris_hilton_051407_04-thumb.jpg
(Flynet)

Keep reading for the part where she tells her to "get real". It's like rich matron "Scared Straight"!

People who are rich and famous are not treated like "regular" people, even though you claim to now be just like everyone else. In most situations, your privileged life works to your benefit. You have opportunities, access and resources like few others; and frankly, you can get away with more bad behavior and excuses than most people could even imagine. However, as the real possibility of jail approaches -- whether it's 21 days or 45 or whatever the latest report is -- it's time to get real. It's time to find "a Paris" somewhere between "heiress" and a character on "The Simple Life." I know she's there, and I know she can be a good citizen and maturely face consequences other people would have to face under the same circumstances.

I am sorry you have been sentenced to jail. I can't think of too much that would be worse. But since you let this happen, use the next couple of weeks preparing not only by publicly learning to fight (not a good message to fellow inmates), but by looking around, realizing that you are not as truly entitled as your money implies. You are a young woman who can add more to her community than establishing new definitions for infamy.

Candy Spelling


Preach on, Candy! This woman has welcomed her snotty daughter back into her life via the miracle of grandmotherhood and now has decided to share her newly accquired joy and wisdom by publicly counseling unrepentant skank loser hoes. I don't think it's gonna take but I would definitely contribute a dollar each paycheck to the cause like the United Way has going on. But only if Candy Spelling is our spokescrazy. The entertainment value alone...Kim Kardashian, we're here for you.




4 Comments

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA * Deep Breath * HAHAHAHAHAHA. You KNOW when she was writing this she was snickering and sipping on a martini with eyeballs instead of olives and once in a while throwing a shoe at a pesant chained in the corner begging for food.

This is priceless. I can't wait to see what Paris's rep will say to that. "Thanks Mrs. Candy Spelling but mind your own beez wax, Paris is too good to be told by a total stranger what her parents should have been saying to her from day One. That is is a ho because she's famous, and famous because she's a ho, and thinks that she's above the law."

Damn...I rhymed!

May 14, 2007 1:37 PM

While some of her advice is good, perhaps Candy should just take care of what's in her own backyard first. Glass houses, babe.

Classic. You publicly humiliated your daughter by practically disowning her and now you want to play "mommy" to Paris. If I were Candy I'd go back and check my menopause medication because it's not working. She is clearly whim to her hormonal fluctuations still and logic/reason is not affecting her decision making process. Why if she's so concerned about Paris' wellbeing, does she decide to publicly scold her like she's a child?

May 14, 2007 5:05 PM


Ha! Like her horse face, fish-eyed, husband stealing daughter and wanna-be-famous, loser son are any better. All those vacuous rich Hollywood parents need to shut their traps. That whole community is a bunch of idiots!

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