When Anne Heche Doesn't Break-Up Half-Assed

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Anne Heche 051707
(WENN)

Not that I'm necessarily a big fan of double-dating with my ex and our new significant others, but I tend to like leaving the relationship without ending up with a bounty on my head. But Anne Heche seems to take some kind of sick pleasure in leaving a trail of angry exes behind her. Per usual, she went about ending her marriage with the same delicate touch of a surgeon using a chainsaw to perform an appendectomy and is nutso, according to her future ex-husband, Coley Laffoon. Laffooon's filed papers to a judge requesting joint custody of their son, Homer, citing her "poor parenting skills" as well as a history of "bizarre and delusional behavior."

In the papers, Laffoon claims that Anne once didn't put Homer in a car seat, she often cusses in front of the child, and packed school lunches that Homer "did not like." Laffoon added that his prior experience as a nanny and a summer camp counselor justify giving him joint custody.
I'd feel pretty bad if I were Anne's lawyer right about now. The only thing I can think of in her defense is that she has really good...hair?


5 Comments

May 18, 2007 10:19 AM

Let me get this straight - she cusses in front of the child and makes him lunches he doesn't like. That BITCH! God forbid should should spank the lil bastid if he acts up! I so hate the society we've become. Ride Lo

May 18, 2007 11:08 AM

Puhlease! That's it? That's all he's got?? He's got nothin'!

May 18, 2007 1:09 PM

Oh my God, call CPS!! She should know he doesn't like PB&J!!

May 18, 2007 1:13 PM

PS Maybe I could understand if one of his complaints was the fact that she chose to name her child after a fat, beer drinking cartoon character.

Maybe she should just use the excuse "I'm country!"

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