Beyonce Upgrades Her Security

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Beyonce's father and manager, Matthew Knowles, recently let go of "Shortie," his daughter's 400-pound bodyguard, from his duties of regular security detail. According to the newsletter, Atlanta Gossip, Matthew made the decision based on his belief that Beyonce required a more athletic, more youthful addition to her security team.

Word is Knowles did right by Shortie - paying out the remainder of his $500,000-plus contract and a $100,000 bonus.

Shortie should be happy that they Knowles family didn't do to him what is typically done to horses and supermodels, after they've outlived their usefulness. Let's just say it involves a shotgun, and an eventual trip to the glue factory. What? How else did you think supermodels lived out their days? Let me guess, your mother told you some story about them frolicking in some farmer's field of wild flowers. Well, it's about time you learned the cold, hard reality. Supermodels and horses are how we get glue. Without them, there would be no crafts as we know it, so stop crying already.

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More photos of Beyonce lounging by the pool are after the jump.

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2 Comments

that third picture should be the new logo for ASL

June 23, 2007 12:18 AM

Danggg...... look at dat butt!

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