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Katie Holmes bypassed the 90,000 entry lottery for a number in last Sunday's New York Marathon. Celebrities get all the special treatment. Her people called the New York Road Runner's Club and she got the VIP experience. I love marathon dish. I will never forget the incredible story of Rosie Ruiz. She was the shifty bitch who took the subway (we call it the T here in Boston) to the finish line and then jumped in near the end of the race. And won. For about an afternoon, then her nefarious plot was discovered. Rosie Ruiz was a bold trendsetter in the ways of shady and one of my heroes. Get it, Rosie! Anyway, back to Katie.
She didn't bother entering the 90,000-entry lottery, New York Road Runners Club spokeswoman Sarah Hunninghacke told "Access Hollywood." Instead, her people called Hunninghacke "very close" to the race date, and the Road Runners club accommodated her. "We offer VIP positions to people who have compelling stories who do not get in through the lottery . . . not necessarily celebrities," said Hunninghacke.
"Compelling stories"? Became a huge name when a mega-celebrity auditioned her to be his new wife. Mega-celebrity revealed his dark side when his PR campaign to look heterosexual backfired when he was jumping on Oprah's couch and looking insane. Had to be inducted into crazy space religion which gave her sores on her mouth, and cut her off from family and friends. Faked a pregnancy as per her new "wife" contract which led to her being photographed with pregnancy belly going up and down. The baby in question was suspiciously unseen until either A) the deal with the pregnant teenager in Belgium was brokered or B) the baby's circuit board was finished. Now led around in couture looking stoned and trapped and plotting escape. "Compelling story"? Yep. I'd unclip the velvet rope for her.
Photos: WENN
sammi says:
Now that's funny!
Trixie says:
This is one of your funniest posts in a long time. "Until her circuit board was finished." Sweet!
Not so suprised says:
I'm glad this is getting some publicity though. She's fake.
kikichanelconspiracy says:
Being a native Bostonian I totally remember Rosie Ruiz. Heh. Crazy bitch.
I think Katie is Suri's mother, I just don't think Tommy Girl is the father. I also think Suri will be celebrating her second birthday next month.
Granger says:
I have no idea where the gay rumours came from and frankly don't care whether or not they're true, but Suri looks waaayyyy too much like Tom to be anybody else's child.
I'm not a fan of Tom's, but I also find it hard to believe anyone in this day and age would actually agree to PRETEND to be somebody's wife just for the publicity. It's like something out of a cheesy Doris Day movie.
As for Katie 'jumping the line', did anyone really believe otherwise??? Now THAT is something that happens in the name of publicity!
Shootingstar says:
Tonight's "Family Guy" was HYSTERICAL.
It contained a skit where the electricity goes off in the Quahog and Tom and Katie, holding Suri, are left in dark. The monitoring bracelet around Katie's ankle blinks and falls off. She screams "I'm free!" and throws Suri at Tom knocking him out. Then she runs out to the back yard and opens the door to a cage containing 4 men in speedos and tells them the force field is down. They all run out of the yard.
Classic.
Hey Cupcake says:
It's all over the tabloids that Tom bought Katie for $600 million. The question is, why? It's not like all this sh*t has improved his image, his acting, or his earning power!
Janepitt says:
So, in the end it was worth it to sell her soul for the perks of being Mrs. Cruise. I have zero respect for this chick.
declanium says:
hilarious
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