All Ann Coulter Posts

Is Ann not a real blonde? Via the always entertaining Craiglist.

I Think Her Name Was Ann Coulter, On The Slopes That Day

Reply to: anon-69503141@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-04-21, 1:12PM EDT

Many years ago, I met this blonde on a company ski trip. I think her name was Ann Coulter. She came as a guest of another employee.

She had a slender body and long blonde hair. Some guys thought her face looked alright, while others thought she looked masculine.

On the first night at the resort, about a dozen of us came back from a bar and gathered around a fireplace. Things were mellow and most were drinking beers. Ann opted for a huge mug of decaf. Opening the fridge door, she asked, “Do you think this is still good?” picking up a quart of ½ & ½ left by the previous occupants. “It expired, but it smells alright, I guess,” answering her own question, Ann poured all of it into her mug.

“Hey, you sure you want to drink that stuff?” One of the guys showed concern. “Don’t worry. I’m always right,” replied Ann.

The conditions on the slopes were miserable the next morning. It was very, very cold and the slopes were too icy. We let Ann tag along with us because her friend decided to take snowboarding lessons that morning. I must admit she looked pretty darn good. She wore a headband, sunglasses, and a shimmering white one-piece jumpsuit with a white turtleneck underneath.

The upper part of the mountain was mostly ice. The right side of the slope, near the tree line, was 100% ice. The left side was O.K. To my surprise, the slender blonde managed the icy runs beautifully. With her blonde hair in the air and her white suit seemingly floating on the snow, she was carving the most graceful turns big and small. She glided through the snow with ease, and appeared almost weightless. She was simply a thing of enchanting beauty that morning, an absolute joy to look at.

After a few runs, we gathered at the top. “Time to eat.” Said one of the guys. “O.K., is there a restroom at the halfway lodge?” Asked Ann. “Yeah, but it’s closed today for repairs. We have to go to the main lodge at the base.” That was at least 15 minutes away. Ann looked a little panicked and said, “You boys go ahead. I have to pee. I have to go in the bushes, because I’m about to burst. I’ll join you at the lodge.”

Someone needs to shut the bitch up.

The heretofore-unknown Jeff Gannon of the heretofore-unknown "Talon News" service was caught red-handed asking friendly questions at a White House press briefing. Now the media is hot on the trail of a gay escort service that Gannon may have run some years ago. Are we supposed to like gay people now, or hate them? Is there a Web site where I can go to and find out how the Democrats want me to feel about gay people on a moment-to-moment basis?

Liberals keep rolling out a scrolling series of attacks on Gannon for their Two Minutes Hate, but all their other charges against him fall apart after three seconds of scrutiny. Gannon's only offense is that he may be gay.

First, liberals claimed Gannon was a White House plant who received a press pass so that he could ask softball questions — a perk reserved for New York Times reporters during the Clinton years. Their proof was that while "real" journalists (like Jayson Blair) were being denied press passes, Gannon had one, even though he writes for a Web site that no one has ever heard of — but still big enough to be a target of liberal hatred! (By the way, if writing for a news organization with no viewers is grounds for being denied a press pass, why do MSNBC reporters have them?)

On the op-ed page of The New York Times, Maureen Dowd openly lied about the press pass, saying: "I was rejected for a White House press pass at the start of the Bush administration, but someone with an alias, a tax evasion problem and Internet pictures where he posed like the 'Barberini Faun' is credentialed?"

Press passes can't be that hard to come by if the White House allows that old Arab Helen Thomas to sit within yards of the president. Still, it would be suspicious if Dowd were denied a press pass while someone from "Talon News" got one, even if he is a better reporter. [read the whole mess at anncoulter.com]

Ann Coulter & Tim Robbins Together
They were just talking at the Wenner Media annual Christmas party. I'm amazed that he didn't throw holy water on her or something.
Rupert Murdoch Offers $44M for Manhattan Apartment
It's just a little three-story penthouse. It's a 20-room, 8000 square foot apartment, with a monthly maintenance fee of $21,469.00. [AP]
Angelina Jolie & Antonino Banderas' Made Love Like It Was Real
Some Original Sin footage was too authentic to be included in the film. [The Corsair]
Trump Names Kelly Perdew As The Apprentice
What an overly bombastic finale that was. [AP]
Tom Hanks Exits Publicity Firm PMK-HBH
Another high profile exit. I bet they're regretting the firing of Leslie Dart. [Page Six]
Lindsay Lohan & Hilary Duff Can't Stop Trash-Talking Each Other
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. [Page Six]
Mary-Louise Parker Wants Claire Danes To Stay Away From Her Baby
I wouldn't take to kindly to the woman who my boyfriend left me for while I was seven months pregnant with his baby.

I love the internet. Thanks to LAist for the photo of an Ann dodging pie throw. More thanks to The Smoking Gun via Gawker for posting pics of the assailants (kind of a motley pair).

Phillip Edgar Smith and William Zachary Wolff. The Tucson men, both 24, were arrested last night after throwing cream pies at author Ann Coulter during her speech at the University of Arizona. One pie connected with the conservative commentator's shoulder. Smith, a UA student, and Wolff were charged with criminal damage, a felony, and misdemeanor counts of disorderly conduct and assault. [The Smoking Gun]

I'd have licked the pie right off Ann's shoulder just to see her cringe.

Ann Coulter Hit With Pie
Two men ran on stage and threw custard pies at Coulter as she was giving a speech at the University of Arizona Thursday night. - Bravo boys! [AP]
Wal-Mart Won't Carry Jon Stewart's Book
Wal-Mart execs felt that the shock of full frontal nudity might be too much for the unsuspecting shopper's eyes. - Just another reason why I hate Wal-Mart. [E Online]
Madonna And Celine Are Related
They're both horrified. [MSNBC]
Sharon Osborne Has Installed Urinals in Mansion
Ozzy has extremely bad aim. Nice [NYP]
Kathy Hilton Gets Paris Role in Film
At least Kathy is good for something. [NYDN]

> Brando Got Cut at 60
And not in the muscular defined way. Ouch. [NY Post]
> Ann Coulter's Democratic Convention Column Cancelled
She reportedly didn't hold up to USA Today writing standards. That's just plain sad. [USA Today]
> Courtney Love Gets 18 Months in Rehab
I feel sorry for the people who are stuck in rehab with her. [E Online]
> Jackson Charged With Imprisoning Boy and Family
This just keeps getting weirder and weirder. [E Online]
> Teresa Hines Tells Reporter To Shove It
I would have told him to "fuck off," but that's just me. [Reuters]
> Gisele Bundchen Is Highest Paid Supermodel
She made $10 million last year. Not too shabby. [Vogue]
> Usher Seems To Be a Tad Full of Himself.
he singer whispered his order into his bodyguard's ear. "Usher will have a Bellini," the bodyguard interpreted for the bartender. When the drink was ready, the bartender handed it to Usher, but was intercepted by the bodyguard, who explained that he was the only one allowed to hand Usher his drink. - I'll just call him a hot idiot. [WOW]

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