All Bai Ling Posts

...by flashing her breast, of course. I'm pretty sure she's not actually in the X-Files movie, but if she were, I could only imagine her playing some sexed up alien like the ones Captain Kirk was constantly sleeping with. I can't even imagine the kind of intergalactic STDs this one would be carrying.

I seriously don't understand why she even wears clothes. They're clearly just a formality. I've seen her breasts more often than Sienna Miller's and I practically have hers memorized.

I love that paparazzo who looks shocked. It must be his very first day on the job because it's pretty much a rite of passage on the red carpet to photograph Bai Ling's boob. Even I've done it myself.

Click any photo to view all 20 photos of Bai Ling from the X-Files premiere in the gallery!

Here's Pink and friend (really?) Bai Ling splashing about in their vag-kayaks. It's probably a comforting shape for Pink since her split from tattoo/motocross dude Carey Hart in February. C'mon, she's a big dyke, right? If it walks like a dyke, and quacks like a dyke. The refreshing thing about Pink is that she just doesn't give one. She will hang out with a gaggle of gay women (a lick of lesbians?), punch a guy in the face, and wear her beret and nose ring proudly. She's very Ladies Night at Meow Mix.

In actually, she's been linked with Juliette Lewis & the Licks guitarist Todd Morse. Publicist arrangement! Maybe she got with Juliette. That would be a hot couple.

As for Bai Ling, I'm totally surprised her kayak doesn't have light up breasts, day-glo and panty roses adorning it. She's subtle, that one.

Photos: SplashNewsOnline.com

More photos of Bai Ling and Pink kayaking are after the jump.

Quite honestly, I think this is the best that Bai Ling has ever looked. She and Jason Statham are seen here on the set of Crank 2. The scene looks like it calls for Bai to to use Jason's body to help relieve her special itch down there. Actually, maybe this actually is a Vagisil commercial.

I really wouldn't want to be the person in charge of laundering those jeans of Jason's. Also, Jason might want to check his wallet at the end of the day.

Photos: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com/SplashNewsOnline.com

7 more photos of Bai Ling and Jason Statham on the set of Crank 2 are after the jump.

Photos: Splash

As crazy as I thought it was when I read that Bai Ling had been pinched for shoplifting at LAX, when I saw this morning that her explanation for committing the crime was that she was in the midst of a break-up, I have to say that my heart softened a little. The wacky actress told E! News that she had been having an "emotionally crazy" day due to having to deal with the "huge problem of breaking up [before] Valentine's Day." Bai's explanation of the couple's problem was simple, "Wrong boyfriend."

Apparently, she was on her way to work on a movie in Albuquerque, entitled "Love Ranch," starring Joe Pesci and Helen Mirren. Now, I know otherwise sane women, who have lost their shit during a break-up, turning into lovelorn maniacs capable of slashing the tires of a woman they suspect is the new love in their former flame's life. And Bai Ling already strikes me as pretty crazy. We're probably lucky she didn't hijack a plane. Her shoplifting may have saved some lives.

My FAVORITE repeat nip-slipper of all time, Bai Ling, was recently nabbed for shoplifting at the LAX airport. The red-carpet crasher was caught at LAX yesterday afternoon at 4:30 p.m., trying to snag two copies of Star magazine and two packs of triple A batteries. The items totaled about $16 and Bai tried to sneak out of the Crews of California gift shop without paying.

Sergeant Jim Holcomb of the Los Angeles Airport police division said in a statement, "LAX airport police transported Ling to Pacific Station, where she was booked for misdemeanor shoplifting and released on her promise to appear in court on March 5, 2008."

And here she is, showing off the ensemble that earned her a spot on Us Weekly's "Worst Dressed at the Grammys" list and I'm starting to think that her wardrobe is now making more sense to me if it's all outfits quickly put together from stuff she's stolen from random boutiques and costume shops.

Click here to participate in our poll, where we're trying to figure out just what she could possibly have been hoping to use those batteries for.

Photos: BauerGriffinOnline.com

This chick is one of my favorite crazies. I like her because no one whores for the camera more. She could be on her deathbed or in the wreckage of a seven car pileup and she would somehow still find a way to throw her arm behind her head and purse her lips if there was a digital flash nearby. Here's Bai Ling engaging in an impromptu photo session aided by giant clown shoes. The other reason I like her is because she'll wear anything. She'll wear antlers and a trash can and carry herself like she's swathed in Chanel. This is the kind of crazy I can get into. Britney's just sad. Bai Ling is inspirational!

Photos: BauerGriffinOnline.com

More photos of Bai Ling posing on Sunset Blvd. are after the jump.

Photos: PacificCoastNews.com

Yes, that's a portrait of herself that Bai Ling is kissing.

(WENN)

Read what the editors have to say about this walking fashion disaster bulls-eye after the jump...

TMZ had a chat with Bai Ling recently in Las Vegas during which time she said that she'd attended wedding earlier in the day--namely, her own. The "husband" in question, who had said that he wanted to remain anonymous, was identified as Dionne Warwick's son, Damon Elliot. Sadly, Dionne's "friends" did not see this one coming. Get it? Ha! So funny am I. In any case, here are some pictures of Bai at her wedding that her reps claimed never happened. OMG, I'm totally kidding! She's clearly not dressed appropriately for a wedding! It's actually a funeral she's attending. Can't you tell by her mournful cleavage that she's grieving a deep, deep loss?

(WENN)

Stolichnaya vodka opened the "Stoli Hotel," in Los Angeles last night, which is set to tour various hot-spots across the U.S., including Chicago, New York and Miami. Basically, Stoli will be hosting a month-long series of events which celebrities (and lucky bloggers like yours truly) will be attending during this marketing campaign of summer fun, cocktails and C-listers. For more info on the events, you can check out StoliHotel.com, if you're curious as to what they've got planned.

"The Stoli Hotel was conceived by drawing upon the brand's roots," said Adam Rosen, Senior Brand Manager of Stolichnaya vodka. "Each facet of the hotel has been carefully selected to incorporate Stolichnaya's authentic heritage, while drawing upon the modern day qualities that top metropolitan hotels possess, including a cutting-edge cocktail culture."

Ah, culture. Cause ain't nothing say culture quite Andy Dick flipping the bird, while Bai Ling and Paris Hilton strut the red carpet. In any case, I'm headed there tonight and promise to return with a full report...and a gift bag. Or a hangover.

(WENN)

Many more photos (Kristen Lefebvre, Bijou Phillips, Shane West, Bai Ling, Paris Hilton, Danny Masterson, Andy Dick, Jason Biggs, DJ Steve Akoi, Golden Brooks, Justin Long, Rick Yune, Gavin DeGraw) from the grand opening of the Stoli Hotel in Hollywood are after the jump.