May 09, 2008
This dude encounters some weird art directors who like him to splash about topless and do weird things with his hair. Emile Hirsch stars in Speed Racer, which opens this weekend. I think it looks boss, but I have serious maturity problems. But insiders are saying the film has some issues that could contribute to it tanking at the box office.
The film is reportedly two hours and fifteen minutes long, which might dissuade the kids portion of the audience. Because who wants Junior hopped up on that much candy and soda? He'll kill you in your sleep! And in contrast to that, the insiders are also saying that the film should have been "aged up" more as right now it will only appeal to young boys. Make up your minds, Hollywood insiders! Damn. Everyone has an opinion.
More of Emile Hirsch from Flaunt Magazine after the jump.
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Thought that would get your attention. Here's Brit Danny Cipriani(third from left) and some of his teammates butt ass naked. It's for charity, but who cares! The London Wasps players got starkers for the Everyman Campaign, which raises awareness for male cancer. The photos will be appearing in Cosmopolitan magazine. Other stars will be joining them but I think they're enough. Don't you? Can the one on the left e-mail me at jharvey@asl.gmail.com? Thanks, that will be all.
Photos: WENN
A solo shot of a stark naked Danny Cipriani holding his ball is after the jump.
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May 08, 2008
Some of these pictures are way too much. That baby looks like it's wondering just what the hell it got born into. Nicole Richie looks like she accidentally got knocked up by the developmentally challenged gardener and is trying to pass his ass off as functional. Here's Nicole and father to her baby Joel Madden posing all over Harper's Bazaar. Nicole's dad Lionel Richie is in on the action, too.
Nicole is all jazzed about being a Mom (when she actually sees her child). She says that the one thing she doesn't do is change diapers. She leaves that to the baby's father.
"It's his time with her. He sings to her. ... He laughs with her, plays with her. It's amazing," she says. Well, I'm glad someone's actually interacting with that child.
Nicole says the very presence of their child Harlow has supposedly caused her friends to tone down their trashy behavior.
"I feel like my group of five to 10 friends, they really love her, like she's theirs ... My friends never go outside for smoke breaks anymore, they don't curse, they are definitely more demure. It's actually been really interesting," she says.
Yeah, I'm sure Paris Hilton has stopped spreading her legs for every Tom, Dick, and Harry just because you gave birth. She may have curbed her smoking but I still wouldn't let her near the baby unless she boils herself first.
More photos from Harper's Bazaar of Nicole Richie, Joel Madden, Harlow with Lionel Richie after the jump.
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May 05, 2008
Fag and hag! Neil Patrick Harris deserves a better quality of hag than Britney Spears. Your fag hag should be fun, supportive and allow you to be the attention whore! It's the least they can do for all the weddings we've attended with you when you were single! "Oh don't you love Mona's new friend Bruce! He's so fun! And that bowtie is darling! He told me I looked gorgeous and he LOVED my shoes. Is he single?" Yeah, but his outhouse door doesn't swing that way, lady.
Where was I? Oh, Brit. Anyway, a tv reviewer at the Chicago Tribune thinks that Britney being asked back to play "Abby the receptionist" again is totally because How I Met Your Mother needs the stunt-casting ratings. Britney's initial appearance, as the receptionist with a mad-on for "Ted" who hooked up with "Barney" at the end of the episode, boosted ratings and might have assured Mother a fourth season.
They have Willow from Buffy? Isn't that enough? Granted, she was much cooler on Buffy as computer geek turned lesbian witch turned evil uberwitch turned sorta uberwitch reformed nice girl. Did ya get all that? Hey, I just compressed seven seasons worth of Buffy storyline into one sentence. You can thank me later.
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May 02, 2008
Here's Victoria's Secret model Alessandra Ambrosio in her latest pictorial spread (literally) in Arena magazine. As you can, she's not above getting lascivious for the camera. Ambrosio is with child, so this might be her last sexy photoshoot until the kid is spawned.
She recently didn't place on Forbes' list of the highest paid supermodels, and sources speculate that it's because of her pregnancy. Wow, so she made a couple mil less than the other broads?
She doesn't seem to mind. There she is shopping at Kitson in LA and looking very content. All that motel room bed bellysplashing on dudes with nary a panty hopefully didn't jostle the baby too much.
Photos: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com
More photos of Alessandra Ambrosio shopping at Kitson are after the jump.
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April 29, 2008
Here's "the cast" of the Hills on the cover of Rolling Stone. Remind me to cancel my subscription. Ok, I don't actually subscribe but if I did, watch out, Jann Wenner! I'm not sure how these biddies got famous because that is not real life they're reflecting. I actually watched it for the first time recently, and I wanted to give my eyes back to Jesus.
And for those of you who care, it's all sort of spicy...ok, I can't even lie. It sounds incredibly dull. Audrina, Lauren, and Lo moved in together. They had a housewarming party. Some old boyfriend from high school showed up. Justin Bobby got a haircut. Heidi made some ho stay home with her. Brody Jenner sucks. You know, the usual. That pained me to write.
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April 28, 2008
Emile Hirsch is getting into this whole cat thing. Rraow! That is a friggin' scary portrait he's posing next to. I wouldn't let that in my home. That chick might come off the wall some night and claw you.
What the hell is AnOther Man magazine? Who funds these things? Where are they sold? They're just Interview offshoots and exist basically to take artsy photos of celebs, right? Look it's Emile Hirsh as a cat person. Emile Hirsch is Speed Racer, and did the usual press junket where he talks about the role and what it was like playing a cartoon character against a green screen. He also sounds like he was smoking that good shit.
"It was so much more, because when you're on the green screen, you have to substitute it with your imagination. The Wachowski brothers just have that much crazier of an imagination than I do. Maybe they have that particular visual crazy gift. So the wildest thing I could imagine pales in comparison to what they had already imagined and managed to put on screen, which is kind of part of their genius, that they just are able to do that," he says. What? Did he just do a U-ie? That must be some hydro he got ahold of.
Emile mainly acted against a green screen, with the hyperstylistic backgrounds put in later. Speed Racer opens on May 2.
More photos of Emile Hirsch from AnOther Man magazine are after the jump.
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April 17, 2008
Which is probably his raison d'être. He exacerbates my insecurity complex. Here's Tom Ford in Prestige magazine, looking hot and rich. He's unleashing a menswear line upon the world which I'm sure only rich and beautiful people can afford.
My issue with Tom is that in one part of the interview he's all about how much "confidence" is a turn-on and how everyone should be confident. And then he spouts this:
"I take pride in my appearance. And dressing well is kind of good manners, if you ask me. You're inflicting yourself on the public in the same way as a piece of furniture. When you're standing in a room, your effect on that room is the same as a chair's effect, or a sculpture. You're part of someone's view, you're a part of that world, and so you should . . . I find it's a show of respect to try to put on your best face and look as good as you can."
Jesus, f*cking christ. Who needs the pressure? Does this mean I can't go out in a hoodie with my face all scruffy? What if I have a zit (or three)? Huh? What if I can balance a beer bottle on my f.u.pa.? Who the hell can be "on" all the time? Soulless fashion robots, that's who. "Inflicting yourself on the public"? Holy shite! You've inflicted yourself on my psyche, asshole!
More photos of Tom Ford for Presige Magazine are after the jump.
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And I don't care. Every homo has a switch list, and she's on mine. Gillian Anderson is so fine. She's fine as wine. She'll make you smack your mama. J. Harvey was a huge X-Files fan (until Fox Mulder left) and he's very excited about the new flick. Though, Scully with long hair is kind of weird.
Gillian Anderson is a deep chick and she recently gave an interview in which she talked about playing Dana Scully six year laters in the sequel to the X-Files movie and how she gets along with David Duchovny.
"There was always this love/hate - hate is too big of a word - but there was always something. It was a natural relationship over a period of time. Now we've grown up and we're older, we're more appreciative of the relationship period and the unique experience we had together and have an opportunity to continue that and foster it. We've always loved each other and we're always going to be a battle sometimes," she says. That translates as "I hate that bitch, but they offered me some nice cash to come back."
Anderson also says that she would never have watched The X-Files on television, as she's not into that TV. Don't turn your nose up at what gifted you with a career, Red.
You know I'm a 'mo when I'm looking at these photos and wishing they had a totally different photographer and stylist. Straight guys could care less about that stuff. Maxim could run badly lit Polaroids, and the pages will still eventually be stuck together. That might even make it sexier for their readers.
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April 14, 2008
Ashton Kutcher looks like a college kid who got caught making time with his best buddy's mom in the photos below. He's in Details and letting the reporter watch his Kabballah rituals, and referring to wife Demi Moore as "one of the smartest people he knows." Keep in mind, he hangs out with Wilmer Valderamma and Diddy.
During the interview, the reporter noted that Ashton took out goblets of wine and water and said prayers over them. He noted that he doesn't follow a "religious leader" but his beliefs are a "combination of prairie wisdom gleaned during his Iowa childhood and New Age Hollywood metaphysics."
The best part of this interview is when Cameron Diaz is on the scene. She's Ashton's co-star in What Happens In Vegas... and he discusses his upcoming gig hosting Saturday Night Live with her. He hits upon the idea of having her do a walk-on. This is seriously their conversation:
"During the monologue, like, you could come on, where you're thinking you're hosting and I think I'm hosting," Kutcher said.
"Oh my god. That could be so funny."
Kutcher kept going. "Like, 'Hi, I'm Cameron Diaz.' And then I'm like, 'Cameron, what are you doing?'"
"I'm hosting Saturday Night Live," she said, picking up the riff. "What are you doing?"
"I'm hosting SNL."
"I'm hosting SNL."
Diaz threw her arms around Kutcher. "Oh my god, totally--we have to do it." They kissed each other on the cheek.
It's like the ninth ring of hell. This is the reason why aliens are going to wipe out our asses out someday. They're going to get this article on their alien newsfeed and just make it a mercy killing.
Photos: INFDaily.com
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March 25, 2008
